After my duty at the LCP, I went straight to UST for the perimetry and IOP exams.
I arrived before 9:00 a.m.
Maybe I was really grumpy due to the lack of sleep and because I have waited for more than one hour already. I was no longer in the conversation mood. I barely answered the questions of the guard, the receptionist, the optometrist/ophthalmologist (who I think was just an intern so for the lack of a better word I will just call her the doctor) and the technicians in the exam room.
I was taken aback when the doctor called my name in shouting manner. There’s a difference between calling out loud and howling. I thought to myself, am I in a public hospital? The last time I checked, UST is a private hospital and I was there as a paying patient through company insurance. I knew, the experience will not be nice.
I showed her who the boss is. I threw my bag on the floor, then she began speaking softly and acting politely. I never intended to get a red carpet treatment; I just wanted to be treated nicely.
After the refractory exam, I was then again asked to wait in the hallway in eternity.
Alas, my name was called again. I was asked to go inside a darkroom along with an elderly woman who I guess will be having the same exam like mine.
I feel awkward as the examiners referred to us on first name basis and we were being instructed as if we were idiots. The lady examiner even pointed out to the elderly that it was her eighth time already and by that time she should have mastered the exam.
I was thinking, if she has mastered it, then she should have not reached the eighth trial. The lady is a dud!
While having my perimetry exam an employee went in and talked to the examiner about his personal issues. Then the other man concerned went in and they had an altercation. I think they have noticed that they are already drawing attention to themselves and causing distraction among those having perimetry exam so they have decided to take it outside. Which I hoped had happened.
The exam took about 20 minutes for each eye but I had to redo the exam on my left eye because according to the lady, I was missing flashes or I had clicked on occasions when there were no flashes. On the third attempt, I simply told her, maybe because I am not actually seeing those lights or maybe I am seeing lights when I am not supposed to see them. Arrogantly, she told me that it does not go that way.
If I was in my fighting mood, I would have snapped so I just took the exam again and decided to get it over with.
After the tedious and sleep inducing exam, I was again asked to wait outside.
After about fifteen minutes, the doctor called me again in the same manner. I let her shout at the top of her lungs and make her look like an idiot before I stood up.
She asked me to sit down in the exam room and dropped some fluid in my eyes. She took my intraocular pressure. It only took a few seconds. Then she asked me that we’re done. I asked if I could have some tissue, she just pointed the same gauze that she used wiping my eyes after she instilled the solution in my eyes.
Finally, I got the result.
Seriously, I will not ever go back to this hospital.

My rotation in the ward for my BST at the LCP has started last Monday and although sleep has been elusive, I still feel the adrenalin rush through my vein.

It is like I am an energizer bunny.

My feet are still swollen and although this signals me to follow the red light, I have no intentions of taking leave of absence. Although we are allowed to have 6 absences for the entire training period, I feel that it is just proper to maximize my training fee by taking the opportunity to be in the ward and learn new things about bedside care.

Aside from the bedside care, we are expected to perform admission and discharge procedures and to carry out doctor’s orders. If you want to excel in something you must not stop at just learning the 411 but you have to progressively learn the craft.

While I feel so pumped up in my training days, there are instances that sadness sucks the joy in my highly cholesteroled heart.

After every endorsement and rounds, I usually review the patient’s chart to check on the diagnosis, doctor’s progress notes, medications and everything I could wrap my mind around.

Last night, I managed only two patients.  One has so many medications needed to be given at certain intervals. The other has just prn (pro re nata) or as needed medications.  It was for pain.

The doctors made their rounds so I was not able to scan the charts of my patients.

At past 6:00 pm, I was asked by the charge nurse to assist the attending – an oncologist in medicating my patient (who only has prn med).  He was given Etoposide – a chemotherapy drug.

After regulating the drug, I looked for the patient’s chart and found out that he has bronchogenic cancer with non small cancer cells.  The cancer has metastatized in his brain.

He is undergoing 6-cycle chemotherapy.  I was really surprised because he looked healthy, not experiencing alopecia and he kept on playing tricks on me every time I entered his room.

I am imagining, If were in his bed, would I still be the same bubbly person that I used to be? Chemo is a very scary and horrible experience based on people who have undergone it.

I know that as a medical practitioner, emotion should not get in the way of my profession.  I was supposed to handle three patients that day but my third patient who had a DNR order expired. It is sad when you are in the room with the relatives to witness the doctor to pronounce the patient dead.

Every training day is a tiring and edematous day but at the end of the day, I do not feel exhausted.

This is what I wanted to do. Screw the odds, Death is not an option.

All I need now is my Trodat so that my hands will be spared from scribbling my complete name and license number on each page of the patient’s chart.

I have got my scrub suits from the LCP.  I was the last one to claim them noting that the start of immersion in the ward is today.  It is actually my off today and my duty will start tomorrow.

I was really apprehensive in continuing my training program but my strong desire to do what I want is undeniably palpable.

For now, I will take things as they are without disregard to my passion.

I can’t help but smile seeing my name embroidered on the scrub suits with R.N.  at the end of it.

It was our second day of return demonstration and I came straight from my graveyard shift at work.  I managed to brush through my notes before punching at LCP.

Yesterday’s demo went well. The preceptor was cool and he even laughed at my mistakes. I am really not good at speaking in front of people (maybe I am cursed to speak with people just over the phone).

Today is another day. I took the number one tab just to get it over with  immediately so I could go straight home to rest. I was clueless that there’s a rear hole waiting for me down the demo hall.

Admittedly, I screwed up at some  steps in performing  tracheostomy care but for whatever that is worth, I do not deserve to be yelled at.  We are all professionals.  The reason I or we are there is to gain knowledge. This is not a collegiate school where it is okay to be howlered.

I paid up freaking six grand plus the uniform not to be humiliated in front of  other students and preceptors. I was really close to crying  and telling him that it is his job to teach me what is the right thing  to do. I bet that he did worse when he was a trainee like me.

I want to stab him in the neck so that he could be intubated then I could perform tracheostomy care on him.

I just kept mum about it.  It is not a dog-eat-dog system.  I am scared that I would blow up my chance of getting a slot there. I had and have to be nice.

Lesson learned.  Practice no maleficence and bring  lots of patience.

Last Saturday, I got a text from World Citi College (WCC) HR that I was chosen to undergo the Nurse Training Program and I was scheduled to take the exam this morning.  To which I texted back that I already went through final interview and has paid the initial training fee of P2500 in February and that I was supposed to be in the February batch of trainees but just deferred due to the short notice I got from them then.

The HR officer affirmed that I was indeed on the waiting list of the next batch of trainees and I should still come to their office on Monday at 9:00 am (which is today) for contract signing and instructions to which I obliged.

I swapped sked with my office mate so I could swing by WCC in the morning.

I was there before 9 am along with other examinees.  The HR assistant, after learning my purpose, did not ask me to take the exam and instructed me instead to wait for the HR supervisor. After almost an hour of patiently waiting, the  assistant informed me in a very apologetic manner that the contract has not been prepared yet and as she was about  to discuss further the supervisor approached us. She told me that there have been changes in their training program.

Originally it was a 4-month training program which is billed at P2500 per month. Starting the new batch, they will be adapting  the 2-month training program and they have not revised the contract yet as the signatories were out somewhere.

I was told that the training program will commence on May 25 and I will be surely contacted for the contract signing before then.

I was done with them at past 10:00 a.m. I decided to go straight to the office and just render an over time since my sked was at 1:00 p.m.

I needed to be productive.  The caffeine I chugged this morning at Mc Donald’s has kicked in and I was not expecting to doze off until the wee hours of the morning.

While in the office, I remembered to phone Lung Center of the Philippines (LCP).  I was included in the batch 18 of their “continuing education program” (read: volunteer) tagged P3000 for three months.

The batch in which I was reassigned is scheduled to be “trained” in mid-July.

I was told over the phone to submit the requirements already.

It’s my rest day tomorrow. So I will drop by to comply.

If my calculations are correct, I will be able to finish the 2-month training program at WCC right before the training  in LCP will start.

I won’t quit my call center job just yet.  Next week will be my first time to be on graveyard shift since time immemorial. I have aasked my team mates to swap their graveyard sked with me starting May 25. This way, I could joggle paid and volunteer works.

I just hope nothing gets compromised not even my health.

I also hope that LCP has pulled their acts together this time. The last time I went there, my name was missing on the list of any batches of trainees.

At this point in time, I am hoping for the best.